THOUGHTS ON MAKING LIFE TRANSITION DECISIONS
In the last Pocket Parts, I noticed a flyer for HYLA’s Professional Development Symposium. One of the main topics for the symposium is “Lateral Movement,” a very important subject for attorneys of all ages. I hope to attend the symposium and learn more because I occasionally speak on the topic of”Making Life Transition Decisions.” A lateral move frequently qualifies as a major life transition decision, especially if it requires moving to another city or state. Also, many of my attorney clients are coping with these tough decisions-whether they be career changes, unemployment, Bar discipline, divorce, or lateral movement. Given this background, a column on career/life transitions seems appropriate to coincide with the Professional Development symposium. Here goes!
Making a major decision which could alter one’s life (and the lives of one’s family) is not to be taken lightly. It is also not an exact science. People with different personalities, life experiences, etc., will almost certainly approach making major life decisions in different ways. Still, there are many common sense factors which can help these decisions be made more systematically and reliably. The following is my top ten list.
Top 10 Factors in Making Life Transition Decisions
Factor #10: Be Fully Informed
It’s hard to make the best decision if you don’t have all available information at your disposal. Try to know all of the options available to you. Research the change you are contemplating. How does it fit in with the totality of your life circumstances? In career changes, the research typically includes: (1) reviewing available written
materials, and (2) identifying people to interview who are knowledgeable about the field or firm you are considering.
Factor #9: Know Yourself
In making any major life transition, it is important to analyze what you are trying to accomplish and why you’re trying to accomplish it. Really knowing what makes you tick will help lead you to the right decision. Knowing yourself includes understanding both your strengths and your weaknesses. If you’re uncertain about some of your inner drives, feelings, or motivations, psychological testing or counseling may be very beneficial. To assist with career changes, aptitude, intelligence, interest and personality are usually tested.
Factor #8: Weigh the Pro’s and Con’s
Under Factor #10, all options, alternatives, and contingencies were identified. Each of these courses of action must be reviewed and dissected to assess how it stacks up against the others. By weighing the pro’s and con’s of your possible decisions, you usually can narrow your focus. Also, this process allows you to consider how each option meets your individual needs and personality characteristics.
Factor #7: Seek Advice
Seeking consultation from respected advisors is an important part of informed decision-making. Having your own personal Board of Directors is invaluable when life changing decisions are being considered. Trusted friends, spouses, mentors, parents and clergy may be idividuals who make up your “life” Board of Directors.
Factor #6: Ask Yourself the Following Question
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“When I’m 80 years old looking back over my life, what do I want to remember most about this stage of my life?” This question may help move you to the best possible decision.
Factor #5: Get Alone with Yourself
After you ‘ve become fully informed, become self-aware, sought out advice, etc., your life transition decision may still be unclear. If you find it’s really tough to make up your mind, take some time to get away for a few days by yourself. This “me” time may allow for deeper reflection and a chance to come to peace with the decision you are making.
Factor #4: Reality Test
If all possible, try out your new direction, job, career, or course of action. This is very important if you tend to be impulsive and sometimes regret decisions you make quickly. Does this change really fit you? Is it your niche? If it is not possible to try out the change in reality, try it out in your mind and imagination. Try to visualize how your life will be different if you make this transition.
Factor #3: Listen to Your Gut
Do a “gut check” when making these important decisions. Be sure you are in touch with your intuition, instincts, and emotions in decision-making. Even if advisors and circumstances point you in one direction, your gut may provide intangible input in the other direction.
Factor #2: Think It Through
Your head is just as important as your heart in decision-making. Think through your past experience, current needs, and future implications as you consider a major transition.
Factor #1: Consult Your Higher Power
Pray about your decision. Or meditate about it if doing so allows you to access your spirituality. If you don’t feel you are a spiritual being, then figure out how your decision fits into your world view or life philosophy.
Deciding whether to go down a new road in life can be very stimulating and invigorating. It can also be a little scary because ultimately “it’s your decision.” Hopefully the above-listed factors will take some of the fear out of the process.
Good Luck!